JEWISH SPACE LASER ACTIVATION PANELS

JEWISH SPACE LASER PANELS

Discover the intriguing world of the Concord Aerospace JEWISH SPACE LASER ACTIVATION PANELS, designed to entertain your inner conspiracy theorist. Unveil the secrets and indulge in captivating speculation as you explore the enigmatic capabilities of this remarkable creation. Prepare for a mind-bending adventure that will keep you questioning what lies beyond the ordinary and will warp reality. 

 

3 NEW PANEL DESIGNS

OPTION 1 - NEW RELEASE! ARK REACTOR ACTIVATION & LASER FIRE PANEL

Building on the popularity of our previous release of the Jewish Space Laser hardware, we are happy to introduce our new and upgraded design. 

Our more sophisticated JEWISH SPACE LASER ARK REACTOR ACTIVATION & LASER FIRE PANEL comes with an ON/OFF switch with new metal switch guards. It is further complemented via the addition of a momentary FIRE pushbutton switch. Approved by several Rabbis and Jewish Scholars, this newly designed button provides a much more tactile and satisfying experience for the laser operator when compared to the single switch versions.

With its ancestral design housing the SHIELD OF DAVID and contrasting metallic finish, the FIRE button is pleasing to the eye and easy to access and operate.

A hidden ancient scripture containing the (until now thought to be lost to time) 11TH COMMANDMENT can be seen around the fire button and reads:

"11th COMMANDMENT: THOU SHALT NOT TALK ABOUT THE SPACE LASER."

We can guarantee that you and your loved ones will be satisfied and entertained with this new addition to our Jewish Space Laser hardware catalog.

 

OPTION 2 - SINGLE SWITCH PANEL (ON/OFF)  

If you already have your own Jewish Space Laser, this option will get you firing your laser with a brand-new look and has the ON-OFF selectors. Designed with upgraded metal guard rings and upgraded chassis.

 

OPTION 3 - SINGLE SWITCH PANEL (JEWISH/GENTILE)

Suppose you happen to be a Multi-Denomination Space Laser user. In that case, this panel allows you to choose between the JEWISH or the less powerful GENTILE setting for your laser. Designed with upgraded metal guard rings and upgraded chassis. 

 

TECHNICAL INFORMATION

• Multi-layer laser-cut switch assembly.
• Real / Operable heavy-duty toggle switch. (20A-125VAC / 15A-250VAC).
• SPST (ON-OFF Configuration). 
• SPDT upgrade is available on request.
• 12V Momentary push button switch. 
• Accurately sized switch guard and bezels based on the Apollo Command Module. 
• Custom fabricated toggle red switch boots. 
• Custom fabricated stainless steel washers. 
• Reproduction DZUS for enhanced visuals.
• Completely designed, manufactured, and assembled in our Orlando facility.
• Ships within 3 days.
• If you need a panel urgently, please contact us, and we can expedite your order.

 

IMPORTANT NOTE FOR RACISTS (If you can read) 

To the racist aficionados (that's a fancy way of saying 'people who really "dig" something and are gung-ho about that thing' - you're welcome for the vocabulary lesson), we're extending a cordial invitation never to be our customer.

Concord Aerospace operates with strict adherence to ethical and legal standards, and we unequivocally condemn any form of racism, antisemitism, or hate speech. Such behavior is entirely inconsistent with our company values of diversity, inclusion, and respect for all individuals. Consequently, we cannot, under any circumstances, produce or ship items containing such offensive language or sentiments. It is important to clarify that while we offer customizable panels, we strictly prohibit the inclusion of any racist, disrespectful, or Nazi-related text. Even if such customization is intended as a "joke," we maintain a zero-tolerance policy for such content and will not produce items containing such offensive language or sentiments. Additionally, we want to emphasize that Concord Aerospace will not hesitate to involve the authorities and pursue the full extent of the law, if necessary, should this situation escalate into harassment or any other legal matter. 

Important usage warning: Currently, our switch panels are sold as memorabilia & display units. They include industrial-grade toggle switch/button hardware as a part of their design. We utilize these components within our simulation projects and wire them to operationalize the switches. In the case of powered operational use, the owner assumes all risk and liability for the proper installation of these products. Concord Aerospace is not liable for any damages caused by our products' incorrect use or faulty wiring.

 

HISTORY OF THE JEWISH SPACE LASER

The first iteration of the JEWISH SPACE LASER was developed in complete secrecy around 1446 B.C. by the Israelites of Egypt in collaboration with space-aliens from planet Zbornak 5. 

It was initially designed as a rapid liquid evaporator (RLE). It was integral during the parting of the Red Sea during the Exodus. The immense energy needed for such a powerful ancient device required building the World's first mobile portable power bank, the Ark of the Covenant.

The Jewish Space Laser and the Ark of the Covenant were stored in Salomon's Temple for some time. The Jewish Space Laser hardware and the Ark of the Covenant vanished when the Babylonians conquered Jerusalem in 587 B.C. Some of the original plans were saved and rushed to the Library of Alexandria under extreme secrecy and were protected throughout the centuries by several different secret societies. 

After founding the United States in 1776, the lost plans were smuggled to the New World by the Freemasons. As a result, the secret knowledge of the JEWISH SPACE LASER was hidden and constantly moved to avoid discovery. These hidden locations include George Washington's grave, an underground chamber in the Jefferson Memorial, the Torch of the Statue of Liberty, and the basement of Nicolas Cage's house (rumored).

The most potent Jewish Laser hardware was developed and made operational as a secret weapon by the United States Military. It was placed in low Earth orbit in 2017 by the newly formed U.S. SPACE FORCE, explicitly created to operate the Jewish Space Laser.

During its operations & checkout testing in 2018, a malfunction triggered an accidental firing of the laser. The powerful beam struck California and started a massive wildfire causing state-wide devastation.

In January 2021, a junior congresswoman of the United States discovered this dark secret and mission failure.

Once public knowledge, the military Jewish Space Laser and all accompanying hardware in orbit were self-destructed by the Space Force. The fallen debris was cloaked under the meteor shower Anthelion in January 2021.

Following this incident, the plans were shortly leaked to the public. As a result, different versions of the laser are now commercially available to the public, including the Non-Jewish ones to be used by the Gentile populace. 

Makes a great gift for any Space Enthusiast and conspiracy theorist.